Finally happy

I always wondered why happiness eluded me for so long.  I thought to myself, how can others be so oblivious to everything, so sickeningly unaware of the pain in life? How could they simply get by living in a state that I had never once felt? 

I asked myself these questions and others of the like for so many years, for as long as I can remember.  

I guess I was spending too much time focusing on how other people could be happy and I couldn’t, and not focusing enough on shifting my perspective as I went along for the ride. 

But one day, it shifted.  This was not a small shift in perspective – this was a kick in the ass from my own damn self, an uproar within me.  This was a wake up call, pure and simple.  

I’ve been wasting my time.  Too many years spent negative, and for what?  What does that really accomplish, that sort of negativity?  I guess the change in perspective taught me that positivity is the only way that you’re going to get through the shit storm that is life with mental illnesses.  And if you happen to be armed with a positive, open mind, you can beat anything.